Finding that Something Special

"distance runners have to have something special, they don't always get what they want, that's called perseverance and I admire that."

This quote was said by my former high school track/cross country coach at my senior year cross country banquet. At the time, it had an enormous impact on my running career. I was being recruited by colleges and looking towards pursuing my dreams and reaching my running goals. Hearing this from my coach made me appreciate dedicating my life to running and all that encompasses it. Strangely, I realized at that point, how much he appreciated my dedication to the sport. As he said, we have something special; distance runners do not get everything they want. In fact, we work hard to achieve small accomplishments and wait what may seem like ages to achieve those great accomplishments. It was fantastic to have someone admire me, us, all distance runners for that "something special" in each and every one of us. 

Four years later, I have lost that "something special". It is still with me....I just cannot seem to access it. After a discouraging and short try at college track and cross country, I lost my love and drive for the sport. Running became a painful task, something that made me sad. My body was against me and so was my mind. I quit. I did not run for an entire year. A scar formed. One that makes its presence known every run I attempt. It is frustrating, I no longer enjoy running. I am frustrated by it. I am out of shape, discouraged, and lost. I love it. I want to enjoy it. I want to heal that scar and move beyond it. 

I want to find my "something special". The thing that is in each distance runner. I need it to motivate me. When I do encounter it, the second chapter of my running book will begin. I am so close. I feel it. I just need to start. 

This blog will be my journal....a place to record all things running. I will be able to hold myself accountable. Accountability will lead to appreciation, appreciation for running, to a new dedication to the sport, to new beginnings, to finding that "special something."